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Friday, August 29, 2003 go away...
nothing here... this rock's mine... an ungenerous crossing... we had of it... boys like rough formulas... let the details lose or win... remember... i didn't know what i had... done Thursday, August 28, 2003 o my swineherd... courses
of rain.... blue thunder hovering heron... words had me... i couldn't help it... all my empty head... the goddess restored... large animals preparing the earth... here it's a
hard world and going away is too sad... there was always a tough kid... never had time for him... it smelled like old leaves... do you remember that scene in sunset boulevard... the one with the monkey... nostalgia is a fine thing... but fix your nose... i'm pretending that nothing has happened as if...
your center were a thought a semi-porous brick... as if something shuddered in your calm green park... setting all middles on fire... as if it mattered... and words are ashes... you said it yourself... as if only knowing that... counted... Wednesday, August 27, 2003 flat... flat boy... flat heart...
flat... a penny and a paper... flat... flat floor... and a lostness... flat... named flat... born flat... and spent... going flat... flat once i realized
i was missing you before i knew you... i found myself laughing... this is no metaphor... the quest had turned itself inside out... i decided to read a lot of pornography... and then i decided to look for god whenever i was awake... or asleep... and then i lost myself in a flash... and felt real good i wasn't
pretending... i was real... and calling destruction down on the heads... all the heads... of rotten choices... sloppy thinking... dreamers under covers... i was actually there... casting death down to the bottomless box... really letting them have it... boy... really bad... you shoulda been there... flames and all finding death
has an awkward smile... i'm laughing to find that death has bad shirts and ridiculous shoes... the cool kids have nothing to do with death... a mess... a freak... a nerd... so gay... takes the regular bus and sits in the middle... death... nose-picking... day-dreaming... death... my password
mumbling... no no no... never say that... shut up... no no... my password heading for nebraska... wherever ballerinas spin... wheat fields... my password expecting rain... and getting mugged... for a studied pose... every morning knows i turn right then i turn left... yes... yes trusting
sight... we draw a cert... no... what was i saying... i was walking... and the sun and the shadows made me... and then the fog... made me... i was a nature boy... and you were all wrapped up in language... i made you.. then the city grumbled... we turned ourselves inside out... and saw our secrets... and wrote the fable that goes... Tuesday, August 26, 2003 no... i prefer not... the phone
frightens me... when it rings... you always sound like i never knew you... someone always asking... but i've never had an answer monkeys and
weasels... gypsies and thieves... popping up in the most unusual places... we bear luminosity in our motor-hearts... we remember silver defeats and golden joy... call me... we'll get together... inconsequentially Monday, August 25, 2003 i've got it happening... and hurrying
through the romantic period to get to the modern... i was dropped on my head... next to you... my frisson... my puppy... grieving came naturally... suddenly we knew how to stand up... and we did... a mild objective chill... rushed through my shoulders... you must have thought i was... in love... but it was patience with the words we had... pasted all over our living accept the
limit... you stood it longer... and sure your sizzling heart... played nothing nothing... like paradise winters... confused.... going out wishing... you get the picture... or move on... no blame... just pick up your feet... jack supposed
an excited one... slipped over... then touring old bookshops... found masterful work on every shelf... supposed to be pedalling harder... in the bright parisian sun... supposed his arm flung out... through brainy traffic... paper-bound volumes struggling to rise... trying harder than ever i'll string
it out... thinner... o... you'll never guess how hard i worked... my hands... studied... prayer clicking
through the wall... a voice like... road dust... not from these parts... he's loose in the world now... quickly... speaking quickly... a middling art... swung Sunday, August 24, 2003 doesn't like this kind of thing...
it's creepy... you never know where you... he said... something about a mirror... kissing a dictionary late into the evening... o gee... and something a little edgier... a shelf... a gutter... windowsill remedies... that kind of thing... huddles like a stupid boy flaming since
the fifties... a crude horror turns us yellow... and yawning we roar through morning's delirious song... i want you to take me somewhere... the view from mt. rainier... has begun to interest us... but first... we must pray she was making
a moral out of... string... it reminded us of the day before christmas... and we said so... but she didn't understand... she kept her fingers busy... and seemed content or putting
up with... comes to blind walking... a rusty regularity folded into quarter sheets... clipped along the edges... more careful... than turning away mid-sentence... to consider the sky... Saturday, August 23, 2003 what part of the light held your
day... hallucinations come like spiders... when you are good... trying your best to adapt... and all my friends... say so... bound like spiders... and eager to remember... like spiders... the fun we had in bombay... sunsets what about...
solitude... pretending a rush... then letting nothing... drop down... having a thought instead of an operation... calling me your inevitable artificial... your old lady... under three-day stubble... saints like... these wild nights... the changes... the startling uniformity... unsingable... unsettled... as sweet
longing... accomplishment follows the road-spun violins... o you know the dance... had a frown and a grin... i stepped on your shy... terrible... in its sudden hands... while you took everything to eat... and ate it back to finish your phrase currently |