Theodore Marcus Larsen

And so I lived in a world that didn't want me.
They shunned me and laughed at me--
They made fun at my expense-
Simply because I was true to myself, true to my soul.
I wrote of the things that I created,
I wrote of the things that were around me in the world,
I wrote the truth.
And they did not like hearing the truth.
My writings could not sustain me, physically.
My spirit, however, grew far beyond those around me.
All because I was not afraid to see the world as it truly is.
If only they knew that my best work was that of mathematics.
They bought the mathematics, written under a different name.
They studied my textbooks. They learned so much.
If only they had read and studied my writings.
They could've learned so much more.
Maybe I could have opened their eyes to the world around them.
Perhaps I have.
Mathematics is the true language of the universe-
It is in everything we see, do, or experience.
It is in everything that we put our human hands to.
I wonder if any of them ever truly understood the truth in the mathematics-
I wonder if any of them realized that everything I wrote was infused with that math.
Perhaps I have touched their lives through mathematics, but I will never know.
If I have, they'll never know it was mv hand that guided them through the delicate and beautiful world of math.
What If I had not chosen the lifestyle that I had?
What if I had denied myself and conformed to their "holy" way of life?
Would that have made any difference?
I'll never know.
Did my personal life change how they read my math? No.
Did it change how they read my writings? Yes.
I can only conclude that it was not my mistake, but theirs.
And it is also their loss.
Not mine.

Erik Czerwin