July 16, 1999

The Feast of Our Lady of Mount Carmel.

This is the big day for Carmelites, but it was a fairly small day for me. A late night led to a sleep-in, so I missed Mass - again. I'm a miserable cur for all that...for never remembering.

I know my/our life is a puzzle to most of the people who wander in each day: students, colleagues, acquaintances, even family members. So here are two brief statements from the 1995 Carmelite Constitutions.

"Carmelites live their life of allegiance to Christ through a commitment to seek the face of the living God (the contemplative dimension of life), through fraternity and through service (diakonia) in the midst of the people."

"A contemplative attitude towards the world around us allows us to discover the presence of God in the events of ordinary daily life and especially to see God in our brothers and sisters. Thus we are led to appreciate the mystery of those with whom we share our lives."

We live in a pretty cynical time. Nobody is supposed to believe in much any more, but I don't think that's true. one gift I've plucked from the traditions of Carmelite spirituality is this willingness to be open to the possibility of God's presence even in the midst of great uncertainty and darkness. 16th century John of the Cross had his finger on the Dark Night, which could shed some light (?) on our lives in this century. I can recover Dada as a pre-millenial Christian because those folks also had a sharp eye for "nada".

Well, I had a little dada nada moment earlier today when I wandered into a tiny used bookstore on Lake Street. Yes, I who am drowning in a sea of paper, ink and musty old bindings found myself in this den of darkness. I was just looking, had no intention of buying - but there sat this Norton Critical Edition of The Scarlet Letter...in near perfect condition for $2.95.

The fundamental absurdity of our human condition is revealed in my simple, instinctual, and utterly irrational purchase of this text. And the Lord of Silly Being chuckled at the counter by charging me not $2.95 but 25¢ - one quarter for this chthonic but useful book.

I don't know. Should a Carmelite be having such experiences and such thoughts?

From the ridiculous to the sublime, Jack Welch writes:

"Contemplation commits a person to complete confidence and trust in the love of God which is continually breaking into our lives. The contemplative stance is an openness to that love and the demands it makes on us to change our lives. To be a contemplative is to be a watch in the night for the approach of Mystery. And it is a readiness to be transformed in an engagement with that Mystery."

I had a delightful dinner out with Murray, who seems to be one of those God-love break-ins. I continue to be blessed by the presence of my brothers.