Sunday, April 23, 2006

funny how some pictures come to life only when you suck the color out of them ...

posted at 9:50 PM

posted at 2:28 PM

i have no trouble sleeping ... would a person who operated from within belief ... participated in some certainty ... ever feel a wrongness in that attitude ... equal to the wrongness felt by the person who was uncertain ...

i don't know ... or ... i'm not sure ...

posted at 10:49 AM

why ... what is wrong with you ... to be uncertain is probably felt as a wrongness ... maybe even shameful

posted at 10:41 AM

in a system or group that places much value on belief and affirms that belief in terms of perceived certainties ... a person who has many doubts will probably need to be silent ... very quiet ... or cautious ... in exposing those uncertainties to the view of others ... yes ... very quiet

posted at 10:37 AM

it's probably tough living with doubts about most of the things most people find it important to believe in ... you'd probably need some kind of rock to stand on in the midst of it all ... even if you were all the time doubting that rock was even a rock ... & maybe it was a cloud ... probably tough ... a tough cloud

posted at 8:39 AM


Saturday, April 22, 2006

so in between marcus/dylan binges i been struggling to settle my booklist for next year ... so far the seniors look like:

1. Beckett, Samuel. Endgame.
2. Chekhov, Anton. The Cherry Orchard.
3. Goldsmith, Oliver. She Stoops to Conquer.
4. O'Neill, Eugene. The Iceman Cometh.
5. Shakespeare, William. Othello.
6. Shakespeare, William. Twelfth Night.
7. Shanley, John Patrick. Doubt.
8. Sophocles. Oedipus the King.

9. Calvino, Italo. Invisible Cities.
10. Ellison, Ralph. Invisible Man.
11. Faulkner, William. As I Lay Dying.
12. Dickens, Charles. Great Expectations.
13. O'Brien, Tim. The Things They Carried.
14. O'Connor, Flannery. Wise Blood.
15. Pynchon,Thomas. The Crying of Lot 49.
16. Woolf, Virginia. Jacob's Room.

& the sophs get ... the usual ...

Douglass, Frederick. Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass.
Fitzgerald, F. Scott. The Great Gatsby.
Masters, Edgar Lee. Spoon River Anthology.
Poe, Edgar Allan. The Gold Bug and Other Tales.
Salinger, J. D. The Catcher in the Rye.
Twain, Mark. Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.
Whitman, Walt. Song of Myself.

there's a certain ho-hum quality to much of this that i just can't get out from under ... what, for instance, can free me from mr. clemens, mr. faulkner ... and where are the women ... especially for the sophs ...

posted at 8:07 PM

reading greil marcus on 'like a rolling stone' but there's this passage on robert johnson that reminds me i first learned anything about johnson from marcus in maybe 76 in mystery train ... that audacious claim for the recordings in his notes ... and here he goes again ... he starts with the old bluesmen other than rj:

They speak the language of what is known; ... Johnson speaks the language of what isn't. That isn't why most of those who came before him lived on long after Johnson's murder at a Mississippi juke joint in 1938; it does make his music a kind of witness to his death. Inside the figures he made onthe guitar andthe shadings of his voice there are always possibilities other than those that are stated. At the highest pitch of his music each note that is played implies another that isn't; each emotion that is expressed hints at what can't be said.

& i link this with the (almost certainly not original) notion that came to me yesterday in class ... near the end of some talk about pynchon's lot 49 ... that maybe you could write a book in which the real story is not CONTAINED in the words on the page but only TRIGGERED by those words ... that another (ethereal parallel?) set of words/images are provoked by the written words and that pro(e)voked business is the truth ... well the actual tale ... and that if you got just the right words on the page then every reader would end up with the same understanding ... not just of the given story that is but of the hidden (and truest) story that isn't ...

since i'm a weak & lazy autodidact in nearly all lit theory matters, i'm guessing this may be some kind of oulipean or lacanian or derridean notion already ... or maybe it's even older than that ... but so what ... at any rate it fits with talk of pynchon because of it's paranoid projections of a world ... and plays into most high school kids' suspicions that literature (especially poetry) is already just such an impossibly coded array ...

& makes me wonder about my stuff at fyp ... what am i (still) trying to do there ... & how i'm still mostly shy & dumb about it because the talking usually mucks up the doing ... & i'd rather keep doing for a while longer ... but the sense that there are some notes i'm trying to hit ... that if i just get the right combination i could change everything ... see ... at last ... get it ... that's at least a part of the plan ... i think

& i end up kind of guilty feeling because i think i should be turning at least this much energy to reading scripture & juan de la cruz & teresa & therese & all because i am after all brtom ... but it's always been hard for me to see them hear them ... did they have it ... they're touted for it ... & this marks me a weakness ... blind even & deaf i suppose .. wondering if i'll ever get it ... ever in the short time i've got ... ever ... another poor student ...


posted at 10:49 AM

Bass writes books and essays about grizzlies, caribou, mountains and hunting dogs. And he crusades. Mostly he eviscerates our leaders for not protecting our nation's wilderness from logging and mining and blacktop and ATVs and RVs.

posted at 8:46 AM


Friday, April 21, 2006

Not e. e. 2

posted at 8:17 AM


Thursday, April 20, 2006

like crossing the international dateline in yr sleep ... i just noticed that my latest at fyp is post 3005 ... well ... that's something, isn't it ... but was it work in the thermodynamic sense ... nah ... or how would the energy it took be counted ... was it actually energy that it took ... even less to type them than to scrawl them out from a sweat-soaked pencil stub ... still ... 3005 ... that's a bunch of something i guess ...

posted at 3:11 PM

Bob Dylan - The Dylan Pool

posted at 11:04 AM

hg on some (possibly literary) values :

understatement, impersonality, restraint, objectivity, historical sense.

Respect for the speech and discourses which are not poetry, respect for the experience which is not language. The stoniness which is not the word 'stone', but inspired it, evoked its evocation.

Serious, not turgid; light, not facile; sweet, not saccharine; bitter, not sour; clear-sighted, not jaded; generous, not egotistical; fair, kind & true. ... think think & ponder this (& neither a borrower nor a lender be)


Wednesday, April 19, 2006

MIDI : Java Glossary


Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Internalational Dictionary of Neologisms

had a great surprise not long ago when sean keefe (of australia) wanders into 305 and proceeds to entertain a few sophomores for the entire period ... with tales of life down under ... good stuff

Everything gets clearer and clearer- then you realize you don't have to understand.

(for some reason this makes my day ok ... thanks, nick)


Monday, April 17, 2006

jonathan mayhew says ...Religion is the best illustration that truth is relative, that what you consider to be true depends on your standpoint, historical and personal. Religion was always already postmodern.

and i'm wondering if one (like me) can be a "good catholic" and agree with this ... i've always been prone to certain kinds of relativism ... sensed that "absolute truths" breed monsters ... & they do ... we've seen them, haven't we ... so if one had to have absolute truth one would need an absolute that would preclude the horrors ... something like "Love Properly Understood" ... (which might be as god understands its ... as we barely do) ...

"relativism" has achieved such demonic status in some circles ... that i've felt kind of pushed out ... shut down ... over the past decade or so ... i just can't figure the degree to which one might be able to talk about the possibly positive dimensions of that understanding ...


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