Sunday, April 30, 2006


posted at 1:31 PM

nick's contradicta are still blooming all over ...

About the same time a generation of men perceive how uncertain their fathers are they prepare for war.

... some are painful ... some are hopeful ...

To want to do most things you have to do creates energy and invites contentment.

... to a sleepy brain ... all are very welcome

posted at 9:20 AM

proliferation, juxtaposition, and disjunction ...

and then ... Withdraw allegiance from the old categories of Negative (law, limit, castration, lack, lacuna), which Western thought has so long held as sacred as a form of power and access to reality. Prefer what is positive and multiple, difference over uniformity, flows over unities, mobile arrangements over systems. Believe that what is productive is not sendentary but nomadic.

... which reminds me of whitman's

...love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches, give alms to everyone that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labors to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence toward the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown or to any man or number of men, go freely with powerful uneducated persons and with the young and with the mothers of families, read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life, re-examine all you have been told at church or school or in any book, dismiss whatever insults your own soul, and your very flesh shall be a great poem and have the richest fluency not only in its words but in the silent lines of its lips and face and between the lashes of your eyes and in every motion and joint of your body.

... though i'm guessing foucault would offer some complex critique of walt's constructed self ... i don't know

posted at 9:07 AM

 

Saturday, April 29, 2006

In a few days we will leave the Dominican Republic for Haiti to see if this is a better fit for us. Though it may seem like a contradiction, we're leaving the DR for the stability (of Beyond Borders networks and programs) in Haiti.

posted at 9:40 AM

 

Friday, April 28, 2006

we walked out today ... all 1400 of us ... the whole school took to the path that dom & i normally travel (though not lately) ... the walkathon t-shirt is white ... funny to look back and see this line snaking along through the fields ... no coyotes out today ...



seniors led the way ... not because they're seniors (as in the past) but because they brought in the most money ... a few asked me about monday's assignment to write a "pastoral poem" & i said "just look around ... keep yr eyes peeled for sheep" ... witty dude ...



and there was a flowering tree ... i stopped to commune & had to jog to catch up to my group ... but i ran & it felt good to run ... kids were awestruck as i passed ... "what's with the geezer?" ... my breath was good, too ... & a moment with the tree was worth it ...



we were back at school in under an hour ... where food product (chips & hot dogs) was distributed in the courtyard ... the ground was reasonably undamp & the sky was blue ...



and the jazzers were rockin' ...





and the rockers were jazzin' ...



and it was all a very good thing ...

i'd been a little worried that there'd be problems with trampling the new growth but, as far as i could see, everybody stayed politely on the path ... dom asked me about the deerleg tree, but i forgot to look

posted at 7:39 PM

chris murray's tex files quotes me and comments:

'. . . across the wide surmise . . . a flock of ancient geese
in sunrise . . . not a single one is angry' --Br. Tom Murphy

what a lovely remnant. gave me pause to consider variance and irresolvability in these relations:
image : thought as word : deed


(thanks, chris ... i don't often get to be lovely)

what follows is a mess of a misreading of chris' idea ... it's an analogy, dummy ... i says to myself now ... it should read "image is to thought AS word is to deed" ... duh ... but i've never been one to shy away from a useful misreading ... so i'll let this stand ... it's friday ...

variance and irresolvability in image

hard to see 'the wide surmise' ... imagine that someone is thinking, guessing, broadly about something ... maybe how to move into the next phase of life or maybe pondering the motives of others ... but the motion from this to the flock of geese isn't obvious or clear ...

if only it had said 'sky' rather than 'surmise' ... that would have changed everything & not for the better ... but it would have seemed more 'accessible' to most readers who'd never think of reading my fyp stuff because it's 'stupid' or makes them feel 'stupid' ... geese belong in the sky ... not in a surmise ... and i'm just guessing that none of them are angry ... how would i know ... (unlikely that you'd ever find angry geese hanging out in a wide surmise ... i don't think they would) so it comes back to that word ...

variance and irresolvability in thought as word

i could say that it was 'word as thought' ... that's what usually drags these things into being whatever they are ... literal daydreams ... there was no surmise ... not even after i wrote it ... there was just that word, but ... something else ... and then the whole thing ... each and every time ... becomes a surmise of sorts ... open to any number of 'readings' ... none of which determine ... anything ... but i don't know ... 'angry' or 'not angry' is bound to stir up something ...

variance and irresolvability in deed

what deed ... the deed of writing? of reading? of guessing? of being a flock in sunrise? of being or not being angry ... ? what does it mean, tom? what could any of it mean? i used to get this question a lot ... but not so much anymore ... sooner or later we all get the mystery shrug ...

i've got no idea what i'm talking about here ... but at least i don't have to pay by the word ... they're free ... in a way

now ... about that analogy ...

posted at 5:25 PM

 

Thursday, April 27, 2006

is this how it goes ... you get angry over something ... say monday night at dinner ... it's a justified anger you know yr right and they're wrong or plain evil ... mind-boggling morons ... fear-puppets ... yr in shock and you throw a good pout for a couple days ... and in yr mind rearrange yr life in three or four ways ... play out the scenes ... then this becomes the problem because a good pout takes far too much energy ... despite all that yr learning ... there's work to be done ... so you guess they got the message ... but you don't really care if they didn't ... now back to normalcy ... but something has shifted in yr understanding and yr senses of how to be and not to be here ... yr not the same & yr not going to be the same ... you say ... because you can't change them ... this is how it goes ... you know that silence is better ... & you go there more often ... well ... i do

posted at 10:46 PM

Viewpoint: The continued betrayal of women ... Some Catholic members of Congress denounce abortion but routinely vote against Network's pro-life positions. In my recent work in a Kentucky clinic for poor kids, each day brought lines of stressed moms with improperly immunized kids, sick over and over, passed from one marginal parent to another, often going days without prescribed medicines because the parents had no money.

posted at 3:32 PM

What I wanted to tell him, but wouldn't at a party, is that he doesn't HAVE a problem, he IS the problem.

posted at 3:24 PM

 

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Goatherds Q. Token ...
Flunky R. Blanket ...
Assent T. Packet ...
Ruin A. Shun ...

posted at 1:03 PM

"You must believe a poem is a holy thing--a good poem, that is." Theodore Roethke

your good poem ... the good poem you just made ... or read ... even if tomorrow it doesn't seem as good ... or good at all ... what were you thinking ... but while it is busy being the poem you need, it is holy ... and good ... sure ...

posted at 9:45 AM

o boy

posted at 8:15 AM

 

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

people might say the most hurtful things ...

people do say hurtful things ...

posted at 1:42 PM

 

Monday, April 24, 2006

AP Central - AP Course Audit Information

posted at 9:39 PM

if you doubt, you may feel that there's something heroic about that ... it becomes a stance ... or you may feel a tremendous self-loathing ... maybe the former will come round to the latter eventually ... i don't think one moves easily (or ever?) from self-hatred to self-celebration ... unless bipolarity is in evidence ... in any case, neither option seems clearly warranted by the simple fact of doubting ... one might just as well assume that doubt demands that one leap up spin twice on one's right heel and toss the nearest cat in a bag ...

posted at 9:17 PM

are some certitudes just the product (evidence) of a failure to grow ...

posted at 7:27 PM

are some doubts just the product (evidence) of a failure to grow ...

posted at 7:26 PM

the part emotions play in any experience of certainty ... one may just be sure ... & this calmness convinces one that emotion plays no role ... but let some challenge be felt ... a handful of rocks thrown into the silent pool ...

declarations of certainty and rigidity ... in tandem these might cover great uncertainty ... an unwillingness to consider any potentially unsafe alternative ... challenge met with anger ...

but there must (?) be some other certainty that has none of this ... that can face any challenge without emotional reflex ... that can be (seem) wise even ... self-collected ... we used to say centered ... would this orientation be proof of a more valid certainty ... is emotion any measure of this (truth?) at all ...

posted at 7:22 PM

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